Coach introduced a term to me last Tuesday night at the Criqui Academy for Brazilian Jiu Jitsu: bitchassness. This term, under its current accepted definition, has been in existence since early 2008 at least. My coach described BJJ Bitchassness to us since there is an upcoming IBJJF tournament in Kansas City on November 3, 2019. The following is not an exact quote, but captures the essence of his definition.

An example of BJJ Bitchassness is when you have just lost a match, and you get to talking to your opponent, asking him/her how many years they’ve been training, what weight class they’re in, count up how many stripes they have, and so on, for the purposes of making excuses for why you got beat.

We would like to avoid this kind of behavior. So what should one do to avoid it? That is what I thought about over the last week.

Jocko Willink offered some of the best methods to avoid this in his book Extreme Ownership. He guides you on how to own your mistakes, because that is the only way to grow from them. So, when you lose a match, own it and don’t make excuses.

I’ve been guilty of BJJ Bitchassness before, counting stripes on another belt or finding out when they’re going to be promoted. To be fair, I was able to own up to it later and grow from it. Being familiar with the term will help me avoid this behavior a little more easily, because I don’t want to be caught being a bitchass.

One thought on “Bitchassness

  1. I will take a lesson from this, my son. Not really, I’m well beyond this level of competitiveness. In the grand scheme of life, losing can happen in so many situations, I find it more beneficial to learn from it. Not only for my mind, but for my over-all health and happiness. I LUV U


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